I promised that, soon, you'd get another message from yours truly about life, love and all that other stuff. I've been thinking about it, and I know what I want to say. What I want you guys to hear and pay attention to . . .
So, we've all had our hearts broken. Maybe your "true love" dumped you via text message (been there, done that) or your best friend left you when the going got tough. Or, maybe, you lost a loved one, like a parent or sibling. We've all gone through storms and showers, right?
I'll tell you all what I've told countless friends and relatives. These are all my honest opinions. If you don't like it or agree with it, then fine. Go ahead and leave. I won't chase you down.
It's all right to cry. Let it out. Crying won't make you less strong or immature. If you don't cry, it'll all just build up inside of you until you have to bubble over. Don't let it get to that, because it usually ends with more problems than what you started with. Believe me, I've been there before.
If you lost your friend (not due to death, sickness or any of that sort) you need to ask yourself if it's worth it to try and patch things up. Sometimes, you realize that things just weren't working out. Adults and counselors try to tell you to make it work, sort things out . . . what if it isn't worth it? What if the friendship was toxic? Just hurting you and breaking you down? If it was, let it go. Move on and come out stronger. Don't let it tear you apart and eat at you.
For those of you who had someone die . . . I lost my grandparents (
only two, not all four) within a year of one another, and I didn't even know my grandmother. It was tough. I saw the difference between losing someone you knew like the back of your hand and losing someone who was never around. My best friend lost her dad when we were only eleven or so in a freak accident. My advice for you: stay with your friends. Don't listen to people who try to make you feel childish for being upset. You have a right to scream and curse and be angry at the world. (I know people say you shouldn't, but it's all right. Let it out!) And remember, refer to the first bullet.
That year-long relationship was just ended with a text, and you're feeling like crap? I know how you feel. So, I'm only fourteen. So, my longest relationship was three months. Big whoop. I've seen adults divorce, my older relative in tears over boyfriends and my friends just shatter to pieces.
Your parents are getting divorced or maybe you are. The love just isn't there. Think things over, really and truly. This applies for people getting married and divorced. Think of the bad times (arguments, fights), but remember the smiles, the laughs. Sometimes, it's easier to cut ties and go your seperate ways. I'm no expert on marriage, but it's not some light thing to just do for fun. Think it over. Really.
2. Your boyfriend (I'm guessing I don't have boys following me, but if you are a guy, or have a girlfriend, then just change this post to fit your relationships) broke up with you and you're feeling lost. I've seen it before. If you don't know why they ended things, ask them. Don't sit and sulk and wait for time to start moving again. Be brave, be strong and find out what went wrong. Don't let them end things with a text saying 'it's over'. Make them talk to you. You'll regret it if you look back in a few years and remember that you just let it all slip by. Don't let that happen to you.
3. It's three A.M. and you're sitting in your room, trying to figure out why your first boyfriend just broke up with you. You were dating for over a year. He was your first everything. Your friends ran out of things to say, and you don't know where to turn. Honey, it's okay to cry. It's okay to hide under the covers and let it out. Just break down, because if you don't crack and fall apart, you can't be put back together. Remember that time will go on, more boys (or girls) will come and you will come out of this, alive. It feels like the end of the world, but remind yourself that it's all right to cry and eat ice cream until you burst. You'll need time. Broken hearts can't be fixed or made invincible. The only cure for a broken heart is time, friends and a good dose of Ben and Jerry's.
- One more thing for relationships with friends/significant others: Don't let them use you as a personal yo-yo. Some relationships are toxic and no good, to put it simply. If your "true love" keeps breaking up with you and making you wonder why you two are together, let him go. Let him realize what he lost, not what he can mess around with. If your friends keep ignoring you and leaving you out of the loop, think things over. What are you getting from them? Giving them support and respect and trust is great for them, but if they're keeping secrets and letting you just fade away, it might be time for a change.
So, there's my message for today. Friendships and love are important in life, but don't let them take over to the point of stress. You might think differently. Maybe you think people shouldn't cry and that they should just move on and say "Screw it" to the person who hurt them. Good for you. We all have opinions and that's part of mine up there. Those are the things I wish someone had said to me when I was hurting.
Well, ta-ta for now, guys! Best of luck with life, love and surviving this crazy ride.
Yep, I'm a shameless fan-girl. Bite me.
